Check out this bitchy little eye doctor when confronted about defrauding his customers:

What a badass! I wish that old reporter would have knocked that fucker’s teeth down his throat.

You could just tell that eye doctor was the webmaster of www.neverkissedagirl.com.

Poor thing’s tryin’, God bless ‘em!

Tiny Dog Fucks A Big Assed Bitch

I bet he won't tell any of his friends about this.

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I think there’s a Verne Troyer sex tape out there just like this.

Here’s the new generation of Pat Robertsons. Start ‘em while they’re young:

The very last clip is sad…in a funny way!

Believe it or not, he’s walking on air…

…or not.

It seems something like this always happens nowadays this time of year…every.year.

A northern Mississippi school district decided Wednesday not to host a high school prom after a lesbian student demanded she be able to attend with her girlfriend and wear a tuxedo.

Really?

This girl has got to be one of the dumbest people alive. First of all, you’re gay in the South, the SOUTH, and in one of the most ass-backward states in the whole freakin’ union. They STILL haven’t gotten over the fact there’s no more black people to attend to Little Miss Southern Belle’s garden. Hell, the girl even admitted herself that she lived in the “Bible belt” and that something like that might happen. Ya think so, Cluely McClueston??

You think I’m being stereotypical? I live in an area where some people still wave the Confederate Flag and have it plastered all over their pickup truck. Hell, Hank Williams, Jr. wrote a song called, “If the South Woulda’ Won” and it’s some people’s National Anthem.

I get it that she’s gay and she’s all about rainbows and all that nonsense. However, the cynic inside me is screaming “ATTENTION WHORE!!” You can’t tell me this girl didn’t know there would be a backlash to her request and lifestyle. I just wonder, what if her little partner would just BE A GIRL and wear a FUCKING PROM DRESS instead of a tuxedo? Would her school have canceled prom then? Lesbians are all about girl power, right? Then why in the hell do some dress, act, and groom like men? BE A FUCKING GIRL!! You have a vagina, you have ovaries! Be proud that you can bear children!! Trust me, having a cock is not all that it’s cracked up to be. You all like strap-ons? Tell me, what pleasure does the strap-ee get?

I also think the girl is a selfish bitch. She ruined prom for others, I’m guessing this is some students’ last prom before they graduate. She was ONLY thinking of herself when she looked at her little girlfriend and said, “Hey girlfriend! You know what would be totally tubular and rad and sexy and hot and *insert teenage slang here*?? If YOU would wear a tuxedo to PROM!! I’m sure in this land of Republicans NOTHING will be said…NOTHING AT ALL!” This is why we can’t have nice things, because there’s ALWAYS some idiot to ruin it for everybody else. In this case, it was the Scissor Sisters.

I don’t give a shit if the girls’ gay. However, she’s retarded if she didn’t think something like that wouldn’t happen in the “deep south.”

….you just KNOW there’s guys in her school fantasizing about what goes down in their “study group!”

***UPDATE***

Now the dumb bitch is suing:

Lesbian teen sues to force school to hold prom.

Of course, people are going to be angry with you for ruining their prom, you retard. Why didn’t you want to go to school the next day after the school board’s decision? That’s right, you was afraid of a punch in the face!

You got what you wanted…ATTENTION, so deal with the consequences, idiot.

This gave me a bad case of douche hives:

The fact that people applauded this mess gave me douche AIDS.

He was doing it wrong!

Seriously, dude? You can look at way hotter girl-girl action on teh interwebz!

I’m sure your mom would understand that a registered sex offender like yourself could never land a chick in real life, so she would be cool if you would sit in front of the computer all day looking at porn, after all, it’s the American way.

Corey Haim has died.

Who?

Ya know, that dude who starred in the “Lost Boys” in the 80s and a few other flicks.

Oh.

Who cares?

I’m sure there’s people that do, but let’s be honest, the guy was a total fuck up. He had it all and threw it away.

Which got me to thinking, there was never a Saturday morning cartoon based on this Corey or that other Corey (Feldman). Could you imagine a cartoon with those two in it?

The 80s were full of cartoons based on real-life fuck ups and has-beens. Remember that Dukes of Hazzard cartoon? Or the one based on Punky Brewster?

I almost forgot about the motherload of cartoons based on 80s fuck ups:

If only they made a cartoon about his co-stars, Dana Plato and Todd Bridges.

This is why we can’t have nice things:

When I was in school, children like that were in a “special” class in the basement and were always let out at 2:30pm.

They like big butts and they’ll tell you why, they’re idiots and I don’t deny:

‘Cause you notice that butt was stuffed with silicone, vaseline, and glue,
Makes my brothers say “Ewwwww!”
My homeboys rejected you.
Cuz that butt you got infected you!